A weekend barbecue in Brazil, or churrasco ("shoo-haas-co"), as they call it, is arguably the best thing to do in this country. It's relaxed, pleasant, fun and inclusive, even if you don't know most of the people there. American barbecues are a blast too, but they haven't been perfected the way churrascos have.
Let's talk differences:
1. Menu.
American cookouts usually center around hamburgers and hot dogs. In the south, they go more for pulled pork and maybe some smoked ribs. It makes for a tasty meal, but compared to Brazil it's pretty JV.
Here, the name of the game is steak. Brazilians bring out the best cuts when it's churrasco time. Picanha, in particular, speckled with rock salt, almost requires one to close his eyes when chewing. It's that good.
There's also a thick sausage called linguica, grilled chicken, ribs, cheese bread and cheese-stuffed-turkey. A lot of it on skewers. Yesterday, I saw cubes of cheese grilled for 30 minutes until they were darkly-toasted on the outside and perfect in the middle.
Side dishes usually include rice, beans, potato salad, bread, salad, etc. It's neither here nor there. America does a better job with sides. Corn on the cob and mashed potatoes are sometimes better than your hamburger. In Brazil, they don't seem to care as much. It's all about the meat.
Picanha with farofa (ground yuca topping).
2. Timing.
At my first churrasco, I helped Dani and a few others in the kitchen cooking some rice and chopping some vegetables. We were a good hour away from eating. When I looked outside, I saw Dani's dad throw eight steaks on the grill.
"Woah, woah, woah," I said to Dani. "What's he doing?" Seeing good meat go to waste gives me a pregnancy-scare level of fear.
Dani told me to relax. Six minutes later, Robison pulled off the first slab and sliced it up on a cutting board. He brought it in and we all enjoyed a piece. Then came the second steak, the third, the fourth and on and on.
You don't really need a plate at a churrasco. In America, barbecues are relaxed, but there's usually a formal start time when the first round of food is ready. In Brazil, you're eating the entire time you're there. There's no start or finish. It's not lunch or dinner. It's just one steak after another.
Edna throwing on some more steak.
3. Quantity.
It's ridiculous. Americans are famous gluttons, but at churrascos, Brazilians are king for the day. I've yet to see a churrasco come anywhere close to running out of food. We hosted one here two weeks ago when my mom visited. We've still got meat from it in our freezer.
On average, you're going to eat about three steaks worth in an afternoon. Maybe 45 ounces total. Then there's the sausage, bread and eventually dessert.
Robison cooks one of probably eight rounds.
4. Beverages.
Beer and caipirinhas. That's all you need.
5. Length.
Schedules vary, but here's one I've experienced and like the most.
Let's say you tell your friends the churrasco starts at 2:00 pm.
11:00 am Two friends come over. They help you cook some rice and take some beer off your hands.
2:00 pm The churrasco "begins."
2:20 pm You and your two friends return from the grocery store with all the meat.
2:35 pm Your first guest arrives.
3:00 pm The grill is lit. More guests arrive.
3:28 pm The first steak comes off the grill. Grab a piece.
5:15 pm You finish your second complete steak.
6:05 pm Hey, there's a karaoke machine.
7:23 pm That feels like three steaks.
8:00 pm Cake!
9:03 pm What are you guys doing tonight?
Let's keep the party going.
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